Home昔日真理報2014年 真理報文章2014 年 6 月【開卷有益】 出人意外的恩典

【開卷有益】 出人意外的恩典

 

Book一場突然其來的車禍帶走了傑瑞.席哲(Jerry L. Sitter)的愛妻、母親和女兒,剩下三個飽受創傷的稚齡子女。原本是一次全家人開心愉快的學習之旅,換回來的卻是一個慘絕人寰的悲劇,怎不叫人傷心欲碎!

意外發生於 1991 年,五年之後,席哲把這次人生巨變所經歷的心路歷程,整理出來,寫成了《出人意外的恩典》(A Grace Disguised—How the Soul Grows Through Loss),引起極大迴響,收到好幾千封讀者來信、電子郵件和電話,向他訴說喪失的遭遇和心聲。傷心的故事雖然各有不同,卻能互相理解、彼此安慰和支持。


事隔多年,當此書再版發行,席哲要翻開書本,重讀一次修訂的時候,心裡有說不出來的的惶恐,就好像打開了封塵已久的傷痛記憶,惹人肝腸寸斷。


席哲自 1989 年起任教於惠沃學院(Whitworth College in Spokane, Wash.),七次榮獲惠沃最有影響力教授獎,也擔任該學院事奉證書科主任,裝備學生進入教會與基督教機構任職。正值壯年的他,從事神學教育,前景一片光明;與妻子感情和樂,育有四名可愛的孩子,家庭生活令人稱羨。可是,一場冷酷無情的災難摧毀了正在萌芽的事業與家園,所有遠大的理想歸於幻滅。


時間並不能沖淡這次嚴重車禍所帶來的破壞和傷害,他永遠失去他的母親、妻子和女兒,完整的一個家變得支離破碎。年復一年的過去,永久性的喪失和傷痕仍在,無法恢復。因為有些災害殺傷力極大,而且不能逆轉,只會帶來翻天覆地的改變。


作為一個資深的基督徒,經歷了如此沉重的打擊,席哲深深體會:盼望在災害之中復原,創傷之後康復,是一種空泛的安慰和不切實際的期待。災難性的損失在定義上就排除了恢復的可能性,它不是要轉變我們,就是要毀滅我們,絕不會讓我們原封不動。以往的生活已經蕩然無存,不堪回首,只有邁步前行,迎向未知的將來,可望還有新的發現。


與許多身心靈受創的朋友一樣,在意外發生之後,席哲悲痛莫名,帶著哀傷去繼續生活、繼續工作,雖然日子已不再一樣,但仍得往前行。他彷彿明白耶穌所說的:「哀慟的人有福了,因為他們必得安慰。」在深切的哀慟之中,只有從他一直信賴的上帝那兒,才能得到創傷被醫治的盼望。


靠著上帝的恩典,他選擇接受這次災難帶給他的轉變,而決意拒絕讓它毀掉一生。


喪失是每個人遲早要面對的經歷,失去工作、失去健康、失去摯親,不同程度的喪失正在前面等著我們,關鍵在於我們如何回應,回應的態度大致決定了我們日後生活的品質、方向和意義。


在不斷反思的過程裡,他領悟一個真理:「不論多麼痛苦,悲傷對心靈大有益處。」悲痛萬分的結果會把生活的狂妄、虛榮與揮霍除去得一乾二淨。苦難帶來了簡化的生活,減少了不必要的東西,看清楚人生中最重要的到底是甚麼。一下子就判若兩人,願意花更多時間在家人身上,向朋友表達更多的關注,更顧念其他受傷的人,更樂意參與有意義的事,更能享受平常的生活。


從一個更高的層次看來,個人困苦的際遇有可能成為一個更大故事的一部份,就像聖經記載約瑟的事蹟,他被哥哥們嫉妒,賣給埃及人做奴隸,又被人誣蔑,囚禁於獄中,最後卻挽救了自己的同胞,免受饑荒之苦,更牽引出猶太民族由為奴之地走到應許之地的迂迴歷史。約瑟一定從來沒有想過,他一個人的故事可以嵌在一個牽連幾千萬人和幾個世紀的歷史情節裡去。


損失有時看起來是很多個不幸的巧合,但親身經歷過苦難的席哲選擇相信每個人的故事都會嵌入一個更大的計劃裡,而他的損失正是由上帝親自撰寫美妙故事其中的一部份。雖然他現時仍看不透、也不明白當中的目的和意義。


事實證明重讀此書,對席哲有肯定的價值。時光流逝,他看到自己和孩子都有長足的進步。雖然心頭依然隱隱作痛,但仍可窺見上帝的恩典無處不在。

 

      聖經金句 (Bible Verses)

喜樂 Joy

喜樂的心乃是良藥;憂傷的靈使骨枯乾。箴言 17:22
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Proverbs 17:22

然而,我要因耶和華歡欣,因救我的 神喜樂。哈巴谷書 3:18
yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior. Habakkuk 3:18

要常常喜樂,不住的禱告,凡事謝恩。帖撒羅尼迦前書 5:16-17
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17

饒恕 Forgiveness

主啊,你本為良善,樂意饒恕人,有豐盛的慈愛賜給凡求告你的人。詩篇 86:5
You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you. Psalm 86:5

你不要說:“我要以惡報惡”;要等候耶和華,他必拯救你。箴言 20:22
Do not say, “I’ll pay you back for this wrong!” Wait for the LORD, and he will avenge you. Proverbs 6:14

你們饒恕人的過犯,你們的天父也必饒恕你們的過犯;馬太福音 6:14
For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. Matthew 6:14

你們不饒恕人的過犯,你們的天父也必不饒恕你們的過犯。馬太福音 6:15
But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:15

你們各人若不從心裡饒恕你的弟兄,我天父也要這樣待你們了。馬太福音 18:35
This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart. Matthew 18:35

謙卑 Humility

敬畏耶和華是智慧的訓誨;尊榮以前,必有謙卑。箴言 15:33
Wisdom’s instruction is to fear the LORD, and humility comes before honor. Proverbs 15:33

敬畏耶和華心存謙卑,就得富有、尊榮、生命為賞賜。箴言 22:4
Humility is the fear of the LORD; its wages are riches and honor and life. Proverbs 22:4

凡事不可結黨,不可貪圖虛浮的榮耀;只要存心謙卑,各人看別人比自己強。腓立比書 2:3
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves. Philippians 2:3

但他賜更多的恩典,所以經上說:神阻擋驕傲的人,賜恩給謙卑的人。雅各書 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” James 4:6

驕傲 Pride

驕傲來,羞恥也來;謙遜人卻有智慧。箴言 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. Proverbs 11:2

驕傲只啟爭競;聽勸言的,卻有智慧。箴言 13:10
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves. Proverbs 13:10

驕傲在敗壞以先;狂心在跌倒之前。箴言 16:18
Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18

但他賜更多的恩典,所以經上說:神阻擋驕傲的人,賜恩給謙卑的人。雅各書 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” James 4:6

忍耐 Patience

愚妄人怒氣全發;智慧人忍氣含怒。箴言 29:11
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end. Proverbs 29:11

並且你們要為我的名,被眾人恨惡,惟有忍耐到底的,必然得救。馬可福音 13:13
Everyone will hate you because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. Mark 13:13

不但如此,就是在患難中也是歡歡喜喜的。因為知道患難生忍耐。羅馬書 5:3
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance. Romans 5:3

我們行善,不可喪志;若不灰心,到了時候就要收成加拉太書 6:9
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

你們也當忍耐,堅固你們的心,因為主來的日子近了。雅各書 5:8
You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near. James 5:8

溫柔 Meekness

回答柔和,使怒消退;言語暴戾,觸動怒氣。箴言 15:1
A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

溫柔的人有福了,因為他們必承受地土。馬太福音 5:5
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Matthew 5:5

用溫柔勸戒那抵擋的人;或者 神給他們悔改的心,可以明白真道。提摩太後書 2:25
Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth. 2 Timothy 2:25

只要以裡面存著長久溫柔、安靜的心為妝飾;這在 神面前是極寶貴的。彼得前書 3:4
Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3:4

嫉妒 Envy

不要為作惡的心懷不平,也不要向那行不義的生出嫉妒。詩篇 37:1
Do not fret because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong. Psalm 37:1

心中安靜是肉體的生命;嫉妒是骨中的朽爛。箴言 14:30
A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones. Proverbs 14:30

在何處有嫉妒、紛爭,就在何處有擾亂和各樣的壞事。雅各書 3:16
For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. James 3:16

生氣 Anger

當止住怒氣,離棄忿怒;不要心懷不平,以致作惡。詩篇 37:8
Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil. Psalm 37:8

好生氣的人,不可與他結交;暴怒的人,不可與他來往。箴言 22:24
Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered. Proverbs 22:24

愚妄人怒氣全發;智慧人忍氣含怒。箴言 29:11
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end. Proverbs 29:11

生氣卻不要犯罪.不可含怒到日落。以弗所書 4:26
In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. Ephesians 4:26

我親愛的弟兄們,這是你們所知道的,但你們各人要快快的聽,慢慢的說,慢慢的動怒,因為人的怒氣並不成就 神的義。雅各書 1:19,20
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. James 1:19,20

災難 Calamity

謹守口與舌的、就保守自己免受災難。箴言 21:23
Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity. Proverbs 21:23

民要攻打民、國要攻打國、多處必有地震、饑荒.這都是災難的起頭。馬可福音 13:8
Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be earthquakes in various places, and famines. These are the beginning of birth pains. Mark 13:8

憂愁 Worry

你們不要憂愁、因靠耶和華而得的喜樂是你們的力量。尼希米記 8:10
Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength. Nehemiah 8:10

主雖使人憂愁, 還要照他諸般的慈愛發憐憫。耶利米哀歌 3:32
Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. Lamentations 3:32

凡勞苦擔重擔的人,可以到我這裡來,我就使你們得安息。馬太福音 11:28
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28

我留下平安給你們、我將我的平安賜給你們.我所賜的、不像世人所賜的.你們心裏不要憂愁、也不要膽怯。約翰福音 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27

應當一無掛慮,只要凡事藉著禱告、祈求和感謝,將你們所要的告訴神。神所賜出人意外的平安,必在基督耶穌裡,保守你們的心懷意念。腓立比書 4:6,7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6,7

因此, 你們是大有喜樂, 但如今, 在百般的試煉中暫時憂愁。彼得前書 1:6
In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 1 Peter 1:6

患難 Trouble, Suffering

義人多有苦難,但耶和華救他脫離這一切。詩篇 34:19
The righteous person may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all. Psalm 34:19

神是我們的避難所,是我們的力量,是我們在患難中隨時的幫助!詩篇 46:1
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1

耶和華本為善,在患難的日子為人的保障,並且認得那些投靠他的人。那鴻書 1:7
The LORD is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him. Nahum 1:7

為義受逼迫的人有福了,因為天國是他們的。馬太福音 5:10
Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 5:10

不但如此,就是在患難中,也是歡歡喜喜的。因為知道患難生忍耐。羅馬書 5:3
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; Romans 5:3

我想現在的苦楚,若比將來要顯於我們的榮耀,就不足介意了。羅馬書 8:18
I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. Romans 8:18

因為你們蒙恩,不但得以信服基督,並要為他受苦。腓立比書 1:29
For it has been granted to you on behalf of Christ not only to believe in him, but also to suffer for him. Philippians 1:29

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