【教養兒女】真情的考驗

 

我曾經聽過一位好弟兄的見証:他年輕的時候相當放蕩,既嫖又賭,還酗酒、吸毒。妻子勤儉持家,他輸了錢就回家向妻子硬要。有一次妻子實在是受不了,不給他,他就一把拿起菜刀,一把抓住五歲的兒子,恐嚇要砍兒子。後來經過多少的波折,終於信了主,改變了不少,並且在教會有事奉。他那天的見証,提到自己終於拿出勇氣來向兒子道歉,但是結果有一點失望,因為兒子說:等著瞧吧!有悔改的心,也要結出果子與這個心相稱。不過兩年之後,他歡喜地告訴我,他兒子受洗啦!明顯這兒子看見結果了。

真情需要考驗,不但是為了受害者,免得再度受傷。也是為了出問題的人,免得他重蹈覆徹。約瑟也是這樣,雖然見到他的哥哥們有悔改的心,但是還得要看在緊要關頭,他們是否還是自私自利。

見小弟兄

約瑟考驗他的哥哥們,自然是看他們是否關懷小弟弟。所以先是說(創世記42:15):「若是你們的小兄弟不到這裡來,你們就不得出這地方」。後來語氣好一點,也還是說:「把你們的小兄弟帶到我這裡來,如此,你們的話便有証據,你們也不至於死。」(創世記42:20)

這一下子,夾在約瑟和父親之間的哥哥們,不敢再度下埃及買糧食來。我們也能體諒雅各的心情以及就是不肯讓便雅憫下埃及的回應。這回是大哥流便和四哥猶大再度表現他們的愛心。這大哥其實是有很大的問題,他年輕的時候,竟然跟爸爸的小老婆發生性關係!不過感情用事的人,也有可能比較有同理心。但是他的建議確實不切實際:

「流便對他父親說,我若不帶他回來交給你,你可以殺我的兩個兒子。只管把他交在我手裡,我必帶他回來交給你。」(創世記42:37)

難道雅各真的會殺自己的嫡孫嗎?還是猶大比較真誠務實。他的承當是有感情的,也是理智的。「我為他作保,你可以從我手中追討,我若不帶他回來交在你面前,我情願永遠擔罪。」(創世記43:9)

即便如此,到了埃及,面對約瑟的時候,如果情況對便雅憫有什麼不利的時候,他會如何反應呢?多少人事前講得頭頭是道,海誓山盟,但是到了緊要關頭來仍可能隨時變卦!多少兄弟姐妹之間的問題就是如此。我常常見到父母親年紀大了,身旁的孩子照顧得很辛苦,而那些不在身旁的手足,還會責怪照顧的手足做得不好。有一些比較有良心的,還算會寄一點錢去幫補一下。多數根本什麼貢獻都沒有,只會責怪照顧的人。真是假冒為善!我們得看看猶大面對危機的時候,實際上是如何回應的。

提心吊膽

果然,他們一回到埃及,約瑟仍繼續給他們一點顏色看,他們需要通過最後的考驗。「約瑟見便雅憫和他們同來,就對家宰說,將這些人領到屋裡,要宰殺牲畜,預備筵席,因為晌午這些人同我吃飯。家宰就遵著約瑟的命去行,領他們進約瑟的屋裡。他們因為被領到約瑟的屋裡,就害怕,說,領我們到這裡來,必是因為頭次歸還在我們口袋裡的銀子,找我們的錯縫,下手害我們,強取我們為奴僕,搶奪我們的驢。」(創世記43:16-18)

這正是做賊心虛,有可能他們聽不見或者聽不懂約瑟對家宰所說的話。約瑟愛弟心切,但第一件事還是來吃頓飯。自然這酒席不會寒酸的,堂堂的埃及首相,為了他的兄弟預備的宴席,哪裡會不鋪張!今天多少人對神的恩典,也常常抱著一個懷疑的態度。不能夠放心地,感恩地,享受神所賜豐盛的恩典,反而誠恐誠惶地以為將有大難臨頭!這種人我遇過幾個。這有兩種可能性:一是不相信神的恩典,二是可能自己心虛、有罪,懼怕罪的代價。其實當神領我們悔改的時候,也會有餘下的恩典。但這彷彿是人的天性,對關愛我們的人也有可能這樣;明知自己不配,當我們所傷害的人對我們好的時候,還會疑神疑鬼,以為對方可能是笑裡藏刀,存心報復。

最後的考驗

「他們就為約瑟單擺了一席,為那些人又擺了一席,也為和約瑟同吃飯的埃及人另擺了一席,因為埃及人不可和希伯來人一同吃飯,那原是埃及人所厭惡的。約瑟使眾弟兄在他面前排列坐席,都按著長幼的次序,眾弟兄就彼此詫異。約瑟把他面前的食物分出來,送給他們,但便雅憫所得的比別人多五倍。他們就飲酒,和約瑟一同宴樂。」(創世記43:32-34)

這一場酒席自然是盛極一時啦,約瑟已經暗示他們,他知道他們的底細。但是他的哥哥們還是無所察覺,可見考驗還是需要的。約瑟最後的一個考驗是看看他們是否真正願意為小弟兄擺上自己。「約瑟吩咐家宰說,把糧食裝滿這些人的口袋,盡著他們的驢所能馱的,又把各人的銀子放在各人的口袋裡,並將我的銀杯和那少年人糴糧的銀子一同裝在他的口袋裡。家宰就照約瑟所說的話行了。」(創世記44:1-2)

他自然是冤枉了便雅憫了。他的哥哥們不知道個中乾坤,面對家宰的控告,還說得理直氣壯的,誰幹這事,誰就該死。家宰卻只要留下拿銀杯的那人,結果在便雅憫的袋子裡面找到。便雅憫面對物証,也啞口無言,百口莫辯。對這些哥哥們而言,這真是晴天霹靂,便撕裂衣服回到約瑟面前,俯伏在地。約瑟給他們最後的考驗提供了他們一個很不錯的選擇。雖然猶大說他們全部留下當僕人,但是約瑟故意講公道話,只要留下便雅憫,其餘的人都可以平平安安地回家。反正雖然約瑟稱便雅憫為童子,但是下面的記載告訴我們,他那個時候已經兒女成群了。這禍事表面上是便雅憫惹出來的,哥哥們可以良心無愧地面對爸爸的。多少人在這種情形之下,很容易會說環境逼人,無可奈何,我們已經盡了責任,只怪小弟弟不爭氣,拍拍手回家吧。

不過這裡所謂的考驗,第一是他們的承當,是否始終如一。第二是他們愛弟弟,無論弟弟如何,是否願意犧牲自己。真情總是需要現實殘酷的考驗,亞伯拉罕獻上以撒是同樣的例子,除非如此,不然就是空話。

 

      聖經金句 (Bible Verses)

喜樂 Joy

喜樂的心乃是良藥;憂傷的靈使骨枯乾。箴言 17:22
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Proverbs 17:22

然而,我要因耶和華歡欣,因救我的 神喜樂。哈巴谷書 3:18
yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior. Habakkuk 3:18

要常常喜樂,不住的禱告,凡事謝恩。帖撒羅尼迦前書 5:16-17
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17

饒恕 Forgiveness

主啊,你本為良善,樂意饒恕人,有豐盛的慈愛賜給凡求告你的人。詩篇 86:5
You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you. Psalm 86:5

你不要說:“我要以惡報惡”;要等候耶和華,他必拯救你。箴言 20:22
Do not say, “I’ll pay you back for this wrong!” Wait for the LORD, and he will avenge you. Proverbs 6:14

你們饒恕人的過犯,你們的天父也必饒恕你們的過犯;馬太福音 6:14
For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. Matthew 6:14

你們不饒恕人的過犯,你們的天父也必不饒恕你們的過犯。馬太福音 6:15
But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:15

你們各人若不從心裡饒恕你的弟兄,我天父也要這樣待你們了。馬太福音 18:35
This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart. Matthew 18:35

謙卑 Humility

敬畏耶和華是智慧的訓誨;尊榮以前,必有謙卑。箴言 15:33
Wisdom’s instruction is to fear the LORD, and humility comes before honor. Proverbs 15:33

敬畏耶和華心存謙卑,就得富有、尊榮、生命為賞賜。箴言 22:4
Humility is the fear of the LORD; its wages are riches and honor and life. Proverbs 22:4

凡事不可結黨,不可貪圖虛浮的榮耀;只要存心謙卑,各人看別人比自己強。腓立比書 2:3
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves. Philippians 2:3

但他賜更多的恩典,所以經上說:神阻擋驕傲的人,賜恩給謙卑的人。雅各書 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” James 4:6

驕傲 Pride

驕傲來,羞恥也來;謙遜人卻有智慧。箴言 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. Proverbs 11:2

驕傲只啟爭競;聽勸言的,卻有智慧。箴言 13:10
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves. Proverbs 13:10

驕傲在敗壞以先;狂心在跌倒之前。箴言 16:18
Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18

但他賜更多的恩典,所以經上說:神阻擋驕傲的人,賜恩給謙卑的人。雅各書 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” James 4:6

忍耐 Patience

愚妄人怒氣全發;智慧人忍氣含怒。箴言 29:11
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end. Proverbs 29:11

並且你們要為我的名,被眾人恨惡,惟有忍耐到底的,必然得救。馬可福音 13:13
Everyone will hate you because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. Mark 13:13

不但如此,就是在患難中也是歡歡喜喜的。因為知道患難生忍耐。羅馬書 5:3
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance. Romans 5:3

我們行善,不可喪志;若不灰心,到了時候就要收成加拉太書 6:9
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

你們也當忍耐,堅固你們的心,因為主來的日子近了。雅各書 5:8
You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near. James 5:8

溫柔 Meekness

回答柔和,使怒消退;言語暴戾,觸動怒氣。箴言 15:1
A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

溫柔的人有福了,因為他們必承受地土。馬太福音 5:5
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Matthew 5:5

用溫柔勸戒那抵擋的人;或者 神給他們悔改的心,可以明白真道。提摩太後書 2:25
Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth. 2 Timothy 2:25

只要以裡面存著長久溫柔、安靜的心為妝飾;這在 神面前是極寶貴的。彼得前書 3:4
Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3:4

嫉妒 Envy

不要為作惡的心懷不平,也不要向那行不義的生出嫉妒。詩篇 37:1
Do not fret because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong. Psalm 37:1

心中安靜是肉體的生命;嫉妒是骨中的朽爛。箴言 14:30
A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones. Proverbs 14:30

在何處有嫉妒、紛爭,就在何處有擾亂和各樣的壞事。雅各書 3:16
For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. James 3:16

生氣 Anger

當止住怒氣,離棄忿怒;不要心懷不平,以致作惡。詩篇 37:8
Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil. Psalm 37:8

好生氣的人,不可與他結交;暴怒的人,不可與他來往。箴言 22:24
Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered. Proverbs 22:24

愚妄人怒氣全發;智慧人忍氣含怒。箴言 29:11
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end. Proverbs 29:11

生氣卻不要犯罪.不可含怒到日落。以弗所書 4:26
In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. Ephesians 4:26

我親愛的弟兄們,這是你們所知道的,但你們各人要快快的聽,慢慢的說,慢慢的動怒,因為人的怒氣並不成就 神的義。雅各書 1:19,20
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. James 1:19,20

災難 Calamity

謹守口與舌的、就保守自己免受災難。箴言 21:23
Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity. Proverbs 21:23

民要攻打民、國要攻打國、多處必有地震、饑荒.這都是災難的起頭。馬可福音 13:8
Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be earthquakes in various places, and famines. These are the beginning of birth pains. Mark 13:8

憂愁 Worry

你們不要憂愁、因靠耶和華而得的喜樂是你們的力量。尼希米記 8:10
Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength. Nehemiah 8:10

主雖使人憂愁, 還要照他諸般的慈愛發憐憫。耶利米哀歌 3:32
Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. Lamentations 3:32

凡勞苦擔重擔的人,可以到我這裡來,我就使你們得安息。馬太福音 11:28
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28

我留下平安給你們、我將我的平安賜給你們.我所賜的、不像世人所賜的.你們心裏不要憂愁、也不要膽怯。約翰福音 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27

應當一無掛慮,只要凡事藉著禱告、祈求和感謝,將你們所要的告訴神。神所賜出人意外的平安,必在基督耶穌裡,保守你們的心懷意念。腓立比書 4:6,7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6,7

因此, 你們是大有喜樂, 但如今, 在百般的試煉中暫時憂愁。彼得前書 1:6
In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 1 Peter 1:6

患難 Trouble, Suffering

義人多有苦難,但耶和華救他脫離這一切。詩篇 34:19
The righteous person may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all. Psalm 34:19

神是我們的避難所,是我們的力量,是我們在患難中隨時的幫助!詩篇 46:1
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1

耶和華本為善,在患難的日子為人的保障,並且認得那些投靠他的人。那鴻書 1:7
The LORD is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him. Nahum 1:7

為義受逼迫的人有福了,因為天國是他們的。馬太福音 5:10
Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 5:10

不但如此,就是在患難中,也是歡歡喜喜的。因為知道患難生忍耐。羅馬書 5:3
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; Romans 5:3

我想現在的苦楚,若比將來要顯於我們的榮耀,就不足介意了。羅馬書 8:18
I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. Romans 8:18

因為你們蒙恩,不但得以信服基督,並要為他受苦。腓立比書 1:29
For it has been granted to you on behalf of Christ not only to believe in him, but also to suffer for him. Philippians 1:29

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