【夫妻同心】愛的承諾

 

couples1「親愛的,明年此時,我們共進燭光晚餐,重溫舊夢,好嗎?」

這是我在前年四月十日,我與內子結婚廿五周年的晚上對她的一個邀約,她也欣然的允諾。正當我要精心策劃來年結婚周年「情人晚宴」節目時,內子的體檢結果殘酷地打斷了我們一切的計畫與心思。當我倆在各自忙著工作、服事的日子中,沒想到癌細胞卻悄悄地找上了她......。

去年四月十日早上,我在中央醫院癌症治療中心陪伴著內子進行第六次的化學治療﹐每次化療為時五個小時。當時,她早已作好心理準備,禱告後,坦然勇敢地坐上化療椅,面對另一次不同的考驗。當時,我心中難過莫名,但面露鎮定,只怕影響到她的心情。當她閉上眼睛進入另一場奮鬥時,我退到會客廳等待,腦中思慮不斷,心中感受良深。

想到今日是我們結婚廿六周年紀念日,竟然是內子及我們全家面對癌症挑戰之日! 念到結婚這麼多年,每當此日,心中總感虧欠。廿六載中,我們沒有幾次曾二人一起安排慶祝佳日,每每都是內子細心的準備,並且盼望我能在這天有所表示,但作為「水牛」,我拙於表達,總是忽略她的感受,心中只有事業。而她每次都包容,期盼著下次會有更好的表現。如今方才體會,從恩愛夫婦營學到的「說愛要及時」的真實性。

一連串的事件:即發現腫瘤、檢驗、證實、切除手術、化療、請假、暫停牧會、搬回老家、準備與癌症奮勇抗戰......,這些都令人感到措手不及,因這完全不在我們計畫之內。但在這個過程之中,我深深體會三件事,是我難以忘懷的:

一. 神恩夠用。面臨巨變,內子靠著那加給她力量的上帝,學習勇敢的面對死亡的挑戰,雖經不少掙扎與痛苦,但每逢難關,上帝總給我們開一條出路。祂垂聽禱告,賜下信心,使我們全家能夠不斷仰望祂,我們真實地體驗了祂的信實可靠。祂實在是醫治的神﹐我們誠心感謝上帝的浩瀚宏恩。

二. 眾牧者、弟兄姐妹無微不至的關愛。內子得癌症消息傳開,許多牧者同工、主內弟兄姐妹、親朋戚友、舊日同學、同事,不論海內外,皆以不同方式慰問關心,或以禱告,或以拜訪,或以金錢、食品相贈,或以親身經歷分享,或介紹保健產品,或以S M S、電話等,我們一面領受,一面感謝,如此的關愛,只有求神紀念他們的愛心。

三. 活好今日﹐並隨時面對上帝的計畫。我們可以有許多計畫,但要活好今日,就得欣然享受神賜給我們的每一天,即便面臨疾病纏身,計畫必須改變,以順服祂的帶領。只有活好今日,那每一個昨日都會是美好的回憶。內子的考驗,相信是上帝要她休息,讓她認識神更深。

內子八個月的治療,對於我來說,是一個極佳的反省機會:反省結婚當日在眾人面前,亦在上帝的跟前立下的誓約﹐無論富貴貧窮,有病無病,我都敬愛她,保護她,終生與她同居。這個愛的承諾,我沒忘記,感謝神,我們守住那一生的承諾。在八個月期間,我立下心志,即花時間陪伴她、鼓勵她、安慰她。除了極重要的事故,差不多每個夜晚都是我們相對談心時光(除了化療之後頭十天)。

想到這,我的手機震動,原來是內子簡訊來說:「親愛的,我好了」。內子第六次的化療終於在下午二點完成,回到師母的家已是接近下午五點。

回程中,我對內子說:「雖然今晚沒有燭光晚餐,但清談白粥中依然看見神愛無限。雖然不是情話綿綿,但在我倆注目相視之中,知道夫妻真情不變。雖然沒有如期之神采飛揚,但你的柔情使我倍覺溫馨。」

我在恩愛夫婦營所學到的「一首情歌」,是我想對內子表達的心意:「我慈愛的主, 在天上的父,懇求你賜下永遠的祝福,使我們懷著信心,共同創造幸福,在困難枝頭上花滿枝。我的愛、我心永遠屬於你,永遠和你相偎相依。我心不再流浪,不再彷徨, 只願你永遠在我身旁。我的愛,你是上帝所賜,是我尋找已久失落的骨,今後我們將攜手共同走向生之途。但求慈愛賜恩惠的主,在上保護永看顧。我的愛,我知前面的路,必有歡笑、眼淚和勞苦,但我相信我的手,必不離開你左右。直到我倆沒齒又白首,我的愛仍然依舊。」

當夜,我對內子說:「好,親愛的,不管今後我們的際遇如何,願主恩手常領,我們相約,年年此日,燭光晚餐,重溫舊夢!」

 

      聖經金句 (Bible Verses)

喜樂 Joy

喜樂的心乃是良藥;憂傷的靈使骨枯乾。箴言 17:22
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Proverbs 17:22

然而,我要因耶和華歡欣,因救我的 神喜樂。哈巴谷書 3:18
yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior. Habakkuk 3:18

要常常喜樂,不住的禱告,凡事謝恩。帖撒羅尼迦前書 5:16-17
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17

饒恕 Forgiveness

主啊,你本為良善,樂意饒恕人,有豐盛的慈愛賜給凡求告你的人。詩篇 86:5
You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you. Psalm 86:5

你不要說:“我要以惡報惡”;要等候耶和華,他必拯救你。箴言 20:22
Do not say, “I’ll pay you back for this wrong!” Wait for the LORD, and he will avenge you. Proverbs 6:14

你們饒恕人的過犯,你們的天父也必饒恕你們的過犯;馬太福音 6:14
For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. Matthew 6:14

你們不饒恕人的過犯,你們的天父也必不饒恕你們的過犯。馬太福音 6:15
But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:15

你們各人若不從心裡饒恕你的弟兄,我天父也要這樣待你們了。馬太福音 18:35
This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart. Matthew 18:35

謙卑 Humility

敬畏耶和華是智慧的訓誨;尊榮以前,必有謙卑。箴言 15:33
Wisdom’s instruction is to fear the LORD, and humility comes before honor. Proverbs 15:33

敬畏耶和華心存謙卑,就得富有、尊榮、生命為賞賜。箴言 22:4
Humility is the fear of the LORD; its wages are riches and honor and life. Proverbs 22:4

凡事不可結黨,不可貪圖虛浮的榮耀;只要存心謙卑,各人看別人比自己強。腓立比書 2:3
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves. Philippians 2:3

但他賜更多的恩典,所以經上說:神阻擋驕傲的人,賜恩給謙卑的人。雅各書 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” James 4:6

驕傲 Pride

驕傲來,羞恥也來;謙遜人卻有智慧。箴言 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. Proverbs 11:2

驕傲只啟爭競;聽勸言的,卻有智慧。箴言 13:10
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves. Proverbs 13:10

驕傲在敗壞以先;狂心在跌倒之前。箴言 16:18
Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18

但他賜更多的恩典,所以經上說:神阻擋驕傲的人,賜恩給謙卑的人。雅各書 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” James 4:6

忍耐 Patience

愚妄人怒氣全發;智慧人忍氣含怒。箴言 29:11
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end. Proverbs 29:11

並且你們要為我的名,被眾人恨惡,惟有忍耐到底的,必然得救。馬可福音 13:13
Everyone will hate you because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. Mark 13:13

不但如此,就是在患難中也是歡歡喜喜的。因為知道患難生忍耐。羅馬書 5:3
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance. Romans 5:3

我們行善,不可喪志;若不灰心,到了時候就要收成加拉太書 6:9
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

你們也當忍耐,堅固你們的心,因為主來的日子近了。雅各書 5:8
You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near. James 5:8

溫柔 Meekness

回答柔和,使怒消退;言語暴戾,觸動怒氣。箴言 15:1
A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

溫柔的人有福了,因為他們必承受地土。馬太福音 5:5
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Matthew 5:5

用溫柔勸戒那抵擋的人;或者 神給他們悔改的心,可以明白真道。提摩太後書 2:25
Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth. 2 Timothy 2:25

只要以裡面存著長久溫柔、安靜的心為妝飾;這在 神面前是極寶貴的。彼得前書 3:4
Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3:4

嫉妒 Envy

不要為作惡的心懷不平,也不要向那行不義的生出嫉妒。詩篇 37:1
Do not fret because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong. Psalm 37:1

心中安靜是肉體的生命;嫉妒是骨中的朽爛。箴言 14:30
A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones. Proverbs 14:30

在何處有嫉妒、紛爭,就在何處有擾亂和各樣的壞事。雅各書 3:16
For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. James 3:16

生氣 Anger

當止住怒氣,離棄忿怒;不要心懷不平,以致作惡。詩篇 37:8
Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil. Psalm 37:8

好生氣的人,不可與他結交;暴怒的人,不可與他來往。箴言 22:24
Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered. Proverbs 22:24

愚妄人怒氣全發;智慧人忍氣含怒。箴言 29:11
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end. Proverbs 29:11

生氣卻不要犯罪.不可含怒到日落。以弗所書 4:26
In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. Ephesians 4:26

我親愛的弟兄們,這是你們所知道的,但你們各人要快快的聽,慢慢的說,慢慢的動怒,因為人的怒氣並不成就 神的義。雅各書 1:19,20
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. James 1:19,20

災難 Calamity

謹守口與舌的、就保守自己免受災難。箴言 21:23
Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity. Proverbs 21:23

民要攻打民、國要攻打國、多處必有地震、饑荒.這都是災難的起頭。馬可福音 13:8
Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be earthquakes in various places, and famines. These are the beginning of birth pains. Mark 13:8

憂愁 Worry

你們不要憂愁、因靠耶和華而得的喜樂是你們的力量。尼希米記 8:10
Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength. Nehemiah 8:10

主雖使人憂愁, 還要照他諸般的慈愛發憐憫。耶利米哀歌 3:32
Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. Lamentations 3:32

凡勞苦擔重擔的人,可以到我這裡來,我就使你們得安息。馬太福音 11:28
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28

我留下平安給你們、我將我的平安賜給你們.我所賜的、不像世人所賜的.你們心裏不要憂愁、也不要膽怯。約翰福音 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27

應當一無掛慮,只要凡事藉著禱告、祈求和感謝,將你們所要的告訴神。神所賜出人意外的平安,必在基督耶穌裡,保守你們的心懷意念。腓立比書 4:6,7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6,7

因此, 你們是大有喜樂, 但如今, 在百般的試煉中暫時憂愁。彼得前書 1:6
In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 1 Peter 1:6

患難 Trouble, Suffering

義人多有苦難,但耶和華救他脫離這一切。詩篇 34:19
The righteous person may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all. Psalm 34:19

神是我們的避難所,是我們的力量,是我們在患難中隨時的幫助!詩篇 46:1
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1

耶和華本為善,在患難的日子為人的保障,並且認得那些投靠他的人。那鴻書 1:7
The LORD is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him. Nahum 1:7

為義受逼迫的人有福了,因為天國是他們的。馬太福音 5:10
Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 5:10

不但如此,就是在患難中,也是歡歡喜喜的。因為知道患難生忍耐。羅馬書 5:3
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; Romans 5:3

我想現在的苦楚,若比將來要顯於我們的榮耀,就不足介意了。羅馬書 8:18
I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. Romans 8:18

因為你們蒙恩,不但得以信服基督,並要為他受苦。腓立比書 1:29
For it has been granted to you on behalf of Christ not only to believe in him, but also to suffer for him. Philippians 1:29

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