Home昔日真理報2017年 真理報文章2017 年 12 月【婚姻親子關係】網上遊戲、社交媒體、網路成癮 (下)

【婚姻親子關係】網上遊戲、社交媒體、網路成癮 (下)

 

過去不同研究報告顯示,沉迷智能手機和數碼產品如吸食毒品般嚴重,中國的研究學者更稱網路成癮為 "電子海洛英"。

akina皆因孩子在玩手機或平板電腦時,大腦會增加多巴胺水平。多巴胺是一種腦分泌,是一種神經傳導物質,將興奮及開心的信息傳遞;可影響一個人的快樂感和情緒,負責大腦的情慾,並影響控制衝動能力的大腦前額葉。由於人獲得與快樂感相關的多巴胺刺激會上癮,所以當一個孩子習慣這些大腦分泌的多巴安帶來的快樂感時,就容易染上戒不掉的心癮,他們不能克制上網的衝動,不能上網時會出現煩躁不安、焦慮、悲傷等心理症狀。而這種危險的心理循環狀態常見於在藥物、酒精與賭博成癮者身上。美國的成癮專家和頂尖的成癮治療師強調:戒網絡電子遊戲和戒毒根本沒甚麼大差別!

專家警告家長,給予小孩手機和平板電腦等同送上一瓶紅酒、或一克可卡因。慨嘆的是網路成癮的現象被很多家長嚴重忽略,研究發現有十個青少年的家長,有四個表示不知道如何控制孩子用電子產品的螢幕時間 (screen-time) 。有報告顯示手機用家平均每日按螢幕三千次,即使三、四歲的幼兒每週也有長達六小時在螢幕上;家長將手機、平板電腦當作電子保母,容易令孩童發展成沉迷和成癮。

筆者認為家長對網路成癮行為應該要有一定的認知,重視程度應如對酗酒和濫藥般的高度關注。俗語有云預防勝於治療,如果家長能早點發現孩子的網路成癮行為,就能提早預防。倘若你的孩子迷失在這綱路世界的電子黑洞,家長不防試試筆者以下的提議。

1. 控制電子產品的螢幕時間和用途-教導他們學會時間管理和自我約束,解釋網路成癮問題的嚴重性。

2. 注重親子關係和共處時間-父母要加強對子女日常的溝通、對成長發展及學習情況的關注、跟孩子在現實生活中共同創造有趣的經歷和難忘的家庭回憶。每天多用正面態度給予鼓勵和肯定,避免採用人身攻擊、指摘、恐嚇和批評等的教養方式,要對事不對人。家長也可以嘗試為過去自己的疏忽和孩子道歉,重新建立信任的關係。

3. 理解、接納孩子的情緒-如果孩子出現情緒反應,父母要耐心聆聽和觀察,用同理心接納孩子的情緒。孩子感到自己的情緒被理解後,就會慢慢將心情平復下來。家長要知道所有的感覺都可以被接納,認同孩子的情緒並不代表同意或放任孩子的行為。

4. 採取「電子數碼排毒」 - 意思是什麼電子產品都沒有,在一段時間內完全禁止使用電腦,智能手機和平板電腦 。家長首先要注意,事前多花時間跟孩子談判和妥協,為孩子做好心理準備,盡量爭取他們對「電子數碼排毒」的認同。

在開始時,必須逐漸慢慢地減少螢幕時間,不能一下子完全拖掉。例如,孩子每天上網七小時,每天可逐漸減一小時的螢幕時間,一星期後就可減到零,繼而持續鼓勵孩子四至六個星期不碰電子產品,專家指出這是中樞神經系統重新設置復位所需要的時間。部分孩子能夠快速恢復正常對電子產品的使用;相對一些孩子可能需要長達一年或更長的時間恢復正常。過程中,孩子可能感到煩躁不安,焦慮,抑鬱,甚至頭疼和胃疼等正常症狀。成功的主要關鍵是家長需要無比的耐性和體諒,帶給孩子無條件的愛和支持。

5. 建立現實生活與電子科技平衡的健康關係-幫助孩子把空餘時間投資在電子產品以外的事情,同時協助他們建立群體歸屬感。例如,多和孩子一起參與互外運動、報讀他們喜歡的興趣班丶進修音樂和其他藝術性的課程等。如果孩子只是單獨坐在家裡,要求孩子不玩視頻遊戲,那對孩子而言將是一個非常艱鉅的挑戰。

要是你的孩子持續有上期文章提及的網絡成癮徵狀,請盡早尋求專業援助。

纽約短宣中心提供一連串有關情感智慧、家長技能、夫婦溝通技巧等課程。有意參與者,請電 718-460-9308 與本中心聯絡或電郵筆者 This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

 

      聖經金句 (Bible Verses)

喜樂 Joy

喜樂的心乃是良藥;憂傷的靈使骨枯乾。箴言 17:22
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Proverbs 17:22

然而,我要因耶和華歡欣,因救我的 神喜樂。哈巴谷書 3:18
yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior. Habakkuk 3:18

要常常喜樂,不住的禱告,凡事謝恩。帖撒羅尼迦前書 5:16-17
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17

饒恕 Forgiveness

主啊,你本為良善,樂意饒恕人,有豐盛的慈愛賜給凡求告你的人。詩篇 86:5
You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you. Psalm 86:5

你不要說:“我要以惡報惡”;要等候耶和華,他必拯救你。箴言 20:22
Do not say, “I’ll pay you back for this wrong!” Wait for the LORD, and he will avenge you. Proverbs 6:14

你們饒恕人的過犯,你們的天父也必饒恕你們的過犯;馬太福音 6:14
For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. Matthew 6:14

你們不饒恕人的過犯,你們的天父也必不饒恕你們的過犯。馬太福音 6:15
But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:15

你們各人若不從心裡饒恕你的弟兄,我天父也要這樣待你們了。馬太福音 18:35
This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart. Matthew 18:35

謙卑 Humility

敬畏耶和華是智慧的訓誨;尊榮以前,必有謙卑。箴言 15:33
Wisdom’s instruction is to fear the LORD, and humility comes before honor. Proverbs 15:33

敬畏耶和華心存謙卑,就得富有、尊榮、生命為賞賜。箴言 22:4
Humility is the fear of the LORD; its wages are riches and honor and life. Proverbs 22:4

凡事不可結黨,不可貪圖虛浮的榮耀;只要存心謙卑,各人看別人比自己強。腓立比書 2:3
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves. Philippians 2:3

但他賜更多的恩典,所以經上說:神阻擋驕傲的人,賜恩給謙卑的人。雅各書 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” James 4:6

驕傲 Pride

驕傲來,羞恥也來;謙遜人卻有智慧。箴言 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. Proverbs 11:2

驕傲只啟爭競;聽勸言的,卻有智慧。箴言 13:10
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves. Proverbs 13:10

驕傲在敗壞以先;狂心在跌倒之前。箴言 16:18
Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18

但他賜更多的恩典,所以經上說:神阻擋驕傲的人,賜恩給謙卑的人。雅各書 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” James 4:6

忍耐 Patience

愚妄人怒氣全發;智慧人忍氣含怒。箴言 29:11
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end. Proverbs 29:11

並且你們要為我的名,被眾人恨惡,惟有忍耐到底的,必然得救。馬可福音 13:13
Everyone will hate you because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. Mark 13:13

不但如此,就是在患難中也是歡歡喜喜的。因為知道患難生忍耐。羅馬書 5:3
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance. Romans 5:3

我們行善,不可喪志;若不灰心,到了時候就要收成加拉太書 6:9
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

你們也當忍耐,堅固你們的心,因為主來的日子近了。雅各書 5:8
You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near. James 5:8

溫柔 Meekness

回答柔和,使怒消退;言語暴戾,觸動怒氣。箴言 15:1
A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

溫柔的人有福了,因為他們必承受地土。馬太福音 5:5
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Matthew 5:5

用溫柔勸戒那抵擋的人;或者 神給他們悔改的心,可以明白真道。提摩太後書 2:25
Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth. 2 Timothy 2:25

只要以裡面存著長久溫柔、安靜的心為妝飾;這在 神面前是極寶貴的。彼得前書 3:4
Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3:4

嫉妒 Envy

不要為作惡的心懷不平,也不要向那行不義的生出嫉妒。詩篇 37:1
Do not fret because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong. Psalm 37:1

心中安靜是肉體的生命;嫉妒是骨中的朽爛。箴言 14:30
A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones. Proverbs 14:30

在何處有嫉妒、紛爭,就在何處有擾亂和各樣的壞事。雅各書 3:16
For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. James 3:16

生氣 Anger

當止住怒氣,離棄忿怒;不要心懷不平,以致作惡。詩篇 37:8
Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil. Psalm 37:8

好生氣的人,不可與他結交;暴怒的人,不可與他來往。箴言 22:24
Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered. Proverbs 22:24

愚妄人怒氣全發;智慧人忍氣含怒。箴言 29:11
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end. Proverbs 29:11

生氣卻不要犯罪.不可含怒到日落。以弗所書 4:26
In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. Ephesians 4:26

我親愛的弟兄們,這是你們所知道的,但你們各人要快快的聽,慢慢的說,慢慢的動怒,因為人的怒氣並不成就 神的義。雅各書 1:19,20
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. James 1:19,20

災難 Calamity

謹守口與舌的、就保守自己免受災難。箴言 21:23
Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity. Proverbs 21:23

民要攻打民、國要攻打國、多處必有地震、饑荒.這都是災難的起頭。馬可福音 13:8
Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be earthquakes in various places, and famines. These are the beginning of birth pains. Mark 13:8

憂愁 Worry

你們不要憂愁、因靠耶和華而得的喜樂是你們的力量。尼希米記 8:10
Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength. Nehemiah 8:10

主雖使人憂愁, 還要照他諸般的慈愛發憐憫。耶利米哀歌 3:32
Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. Lamentations 3:32

凡勞苦擔重擔的人,可以到我這裡來,我就使你們得安息。馬太福音 11:28
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28

我留下平安給你們、我將我的平安賜給你們.我所賜的、不像世人所賜的.你們心裏不要憂愁、也不要膽怯。約翰福音 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27

應當一無掛慮,只要凡事藉著禱告、祈求和感謝,將你們所要的告訴神。神所賜出人意外的平安,必在基督耶穌裡,保守你們的心懷意念。腓立比書 4:6,7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6,7

因此, 你們是大有喜樂, 但如今, 在百般的試煉中暫時憂愁。彼得前書 1:6
In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 1 Peter 1:6

患難 Trouble, Suffering

義人多有苦難,但耶和華救他脫離這一切。詩篇 34:19
The righteous person may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all. Psalm 34:19

神是我們的避難所,是我們的力量,是我們在患難中隨時的幫助!詩篇 46:1
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1

耶和華本為善,在患難的日子為人的保障,並且認得那些投靠他的人。那鴻書 1:7
The LORD is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him. Nahum 1:7

為義受逼迫的人有福了,因為天國是他們的。馬太福音 5:10
Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 5:10

不但如此,就是在患難中,也是歡歡喜喜的。因為知道患難生忍耐。羅馬書 5:3
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; Romans 5:3

我想現在的苦楚,若比將來要顯於我們的榮耀,就不足介意了。羅馬書 8:18
I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. Romans 8:18

因為你們蒙恩,不但得以信服基督,並要為他受苦。腓立比書 1:29
For it has been granted to you on behalf of Christ not only to believe in him, but also to suffer for him. Philippians 1:29

Go to top