You ask me why I left the church?
I did not leave the church; I left hypocrisy.
Recently I came across a video on Youtube by Grant Skeldon looking into the issue: Millennials and the Church. A lot of the remarks and questions raised from the video echos the discussions I have had over the years while working with youths and talking with various youth pastors. Although every individual is different, every case is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution to any of the problems, a few can be summarized or categorized. The tipping point for young people towards the church can be encapsulated into authenticity, uninspiring, and community.
Below is a composition of stories from various sources I have conglomerate together in the hope to stir thoughts and discussions. If any of the following stories echos familiarity, it is purely coincidental.
Shirley
I love my parents. They are some of the most God-loving Christian I know. They love the church. They love the Bible. They love the fellowship and communion with brothers and sisters. I remember as I was growing up, every Saturday night we would have someone from the church over for dinner. They were not a fancy Vegas-style buffet feast, just a humble home-style dinner, but sharing the table is a regular in my family. It has attracted a lot of publicity and popularity in the church family as well. Some even joke that "Dinner at the Hurley's" is the unofficial act for inaugurating new church members rather than the membership ceremony during Sunday worship service. I believe it also might be the reason why I enjoy hosting my friends when I now have my own place. My family portrayed the perfect image of any Christian family. My parents were even nominated as the modelled couple by their peers at church.
However, my family also has a rule—what happens at home stays at home. That means nobody knows about how often my dad got drunk and hit my mom. That means nobody knows about my mom sneaking away at night to go to the casino and returning home just before dawn. That means nobody knows about the sixteen years of pain and heartaches I endured going to church every Sunday pretending my parents are not the same people I see at home.
I love my parents. They poured their life and heart out for the family. I was never in need of anything. Everything I needed was always provided for. But I cannot pretend they are the modelled Christian everyone talks about.
I remember one time I got the guts and tried to talk to my dad about drinking less. His reply was, "We are no saints. We are all sinners. Do you know how stressful it is at work?" Then he went and grab the bottle of whiskey off the shelf and went to his studies.
No, I did not leave the church. I did not leave God, nor did I leave my faith. I still proclaim myself a Christian. What I cannot accept is the life I was brought up with, believing that is the fullness of life Jesus died for. What I cannot accept is the secrecy I have lived in for so long, believing that is the normality of Christian life. What I cannot accept is the gospel is confined to Jesus' saving act, believing sanctification is ours to struggle with, and holiness is in the heart, only.
Terry
I thought my faith is supposed to be holistically integrated into every aspect of my life. I thought my faith is supposed to empower and transform my whole being—allowing Christ to manifest in all that I do. Why am I persecuted by my pastor when I voice out the injustice in the political system? Why am I silenced by my church when I take a stand against inequality for those who cannot speak for themselves? Where is the church as a beacon of light in a time of darkness? Where is the church as the salt to speak the truth and bring betterment to society?
I believe one of the lost gems of Hollywood is the movie, Kingdom of Heaven. It was directed by the acclaimed Ridley Scott and had the astonishing casts including, Orlando Bloom, Eva Green, Jeremy Irons, Liam Neeson, Edward Norton, and those GOT fans, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, and Iain Glen. However, when it was released, it was completely overshadowed by the highly anticipated Star Wars: Episode III. Moreover, the story is set against one of the darkest times in the church's history—the Crusade. Sadly, the story of a boy turned knight hopelessly defending Jerusalem against Muslim invaders is incomparable to the jaw-gripping lightsaber duel between the lost Jedi Anakin Skywalker and his faithful master Obi-wan Kenobi. Nevertheless, the Kingdom of Heaven holds a special place in my heart as I believe it vividly illustrates true Christian life.
We are a generation born into the world in its most chaotic state. We face multiple life-threatening global issues an entire generation cannot solve. None of us created these problems, but it has fallen upon us to find the cure and solutions. #GlobalWarming is not statistical numbers or scientific concern or political issue, it is the world we are going to live in for the next fifty years. Tamir Rice, George Floyd, BreonnaTaylor are not just names that appeared on the evening news. #BlackLivesMatter is not just another hashtag on social media. #socialinjustice is proof of the brokenness in our humanity. I don't believe the goal of our strive is equality. We are purposely and intentionally made different, each unique in our own way. Paul did not call the church to treat everyone with equality; he calls the church to be in unity. There is no unity without uniqueness. There is no unity without individuality. The church must voice this truth amidst all the noise of society. The church must shout the truth so loud even the deaf can feel the trembling. Yet, the church is silent. The church deliberately shies away because some believ e the church should not interfere with social policies or enter into political arguments or else the church will suffer dire consequences.
If the Israelites were accused of idolatry when they worshipped Ba'al, we are equally guilty of worshipping comfort. We want to follow a God who grants us prosperity, stability, and security. We give tithes and offerings expecting God in return grants our wishes and commands. We are no Christian. We are pagans who happen to worship YHWH just as we worship Ba'al. We are our own god.
I cannot accept that as my faith. I cannot ignore the burning in my heart to stay silent. I cannot pretend I live in a bubble and disregard the crying of my neighbour. I do not have solutions to all the world's problems. But neither can I fantasize about these problems doesn't concern me as this home is only temporary and there is a much better place waiting for me in heaven. Obedience is never at my convenience. Calling is never according to my liking. Yet, both demand my willingness, both require my humility, because that is the Jesus Christ I follow.
(The author is the English Ministry Pastor at Vancouver Chinese Christian Short Term Mission Training Centre.)